This friend snacks on Cheerios in our therapy kitchen!

Picky Eating: Phase or Problem?

By Mrs. Ann-Marie, Clinical Director and Bilingual OT 

As a parent, picky eating can be a frustrating experience for you and your child. Food preferences can turn the dinner table into a battleground — and oftentimes, no one is coming out victorious. While this endless cycle of refusing the food you’ve prepared may feel defeating, you are not alone!

Picky eating is very common in toddlers and preschoolers, who are learning the taste of all kinds of new foods, as well as how to determine their own boundaries. Below, we’ve included a few top tips from our therapists to help you encourage your child to give those new foods a try. 

Consistency is Key

Say your child didn’t like the taste of celery. While there may be a strong urge to abandon that food in the household altogether, offering it consistently can actually help your child. Exposing them to the kinds of food you want them to be eating is critical for them to decide to try it for themselves. After all, if your child has never seen the food you’ve offered them before, chances are that they’ll be more hesitant to eat it. 

Keep things consistent and relaxed— mealtimes should not be high-stakes for you, or your child! Consider making the dinner table a “no pressure’ zone. Once your child’s plate is ready, leave it to them to determine how much they are willing to eat. Try to avoid the urge to pressure them, which may include saying something like: “just one bite” or “you’ll make me happy if you try this.” While it may feel counterintuitive, at first, giving your child the choice of what to eat can actually encourage them to try more foods over time.  

Supporting this consistency, parents should always model the behavior they want to see. If there’s a food you want your picky eater to try, make sure you’re eating it, too. If it happens to be a food you don’t like, this can be even more important. Explaining to your child that you’re still learning to like certain foods, yourself, can help them to feel more comfortable, and empower them to want to try new foods of their own.

Set the Tone (& Table)

As the parent of a picky eater, you may be worried about your child’s nutrition and growth. Sometimes, it may feel more important to have them eat something, instead of nothing at all. While it is important to make sure that your child is eating, your job is to provide healthy and nutritious meals— and it’s up to your child to decide whether he or she will eat them. 

Parents should ultimately decide what is served during mealtimes. When determining what to make, make sure that there is at least one thing on the plate that your child will eat. This way, if your child is not eating dinner, then you know that they at least had access to an option that they like. 

The environment where you eat can also play a role in picky eating. Have a specific place where your family gathers for dinner, and aim to minimize distractions, like phones and TV. Sitting down at the table allows kids (and parents!) to slow down and listen to their bodies— which ultimately allows everyone to eat better. 

Make it Fun

Encouraging your child to try something new can be as easy as turning it into a game. While your little one may be a bit past the days of “here comes the airplane” there are still plenty of ways to make mealtimes fun, while encouraging them to try the new foods on their plate. 

For example, you could try involving your kids in the preparation of the meal itself. This can be a great activity for all ages— younger children can help to wash and dry fruits and vegetables, while older children may be able to help with the cutting and other cooking elements, under your supervision. That sense of accomplishment and contributing to the meal can also fuel their desire to taste-test the meal you’ve made. 

Another way to add in some fun to mealtime is by explaining what the food we eat does for our bodies. This should go beyond saying something is “good for you” or “bad for you”— giving out a fun fact like “spinach helps build your muscles” or “yellow pepper helps with your memory” can make these unknown or disliked foods more interesting and appealing. 

Phase or Problem?

How do you know whether your child’s picky eating is a developmental phase or the indicator of a larger issue at hand? Many children will grow out of their picky eating habits within two to three years. However, if your child is still struggling with their eating habits following this period— or scarcely eating at all— be on the lookout for any of the following signs. 

  • Limited Variety: Extreme picky eaters may have only one or two “safe foods” that they can eat. 
  • Sensitivity to Smells, Tastes or Textures: Children with higher sensory sensitivities may struggle to try as many different foods as their peers.  
  • Extreme Distress: If you’re facing endless nights of full tantrums at the dinner table over foods your child does not prefer, it may be worthwhile to seek professional guidance. 

If you sense your child is truly struggling with their picky eating, feeding therapy may be a good solution to look into. Feeding therapy works by empowering your child to buy into the treatment — first being willing to exist in the same room as certain foods, then have other ways of interacting with it, perhaps by sight or touch. 

This helps to determine what about the new food they may be avoiding, which allows the therapist to begin to expose them to those foods in a carefully-controlled therapeutic environment. By practicing trying new foods, your child will be able to discover new likes and dislikes— building their confidence and ultimately aiming to empower them to continue to expand their personal palette.