The “first day of school jitters” are something nearly every family experiences. Whether your child is heading to preschool, kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, or starting at a brand-new school, it’s completely normal to have a mix of excitement and nervousness.

Children are entering unfamiliar environments, meeting new teachers, learning new routines, and wondering what to expect. Parents often feel just as anxious as their children.

The good news? With preparation, encouragement, and the right support, school anxiety in children can be reduced significantly.

At Therapy Smarts, we help children throughout Durham, Chapel Hill, Cary, Apex, Hillsborough, Pittsboro, and the Triangle area develop the confidence, communication, emotional regulation, and motor skills they need for a successful school year.

Why Do Children Experience First Day of School Anxiety?

Children thrive on routine. Starting school introduces many unknowns that can make them feel uncertain.

Common worries include:

• Will I make friends?
• Will my teacher like me?
• What if I don’t know where to go?

Young children often cannot explain these worries with words. Instead, anxiety may appear as changes in behavior.

Signs of School Anxiety

Parents may notice:

• Trouble sleeping
• Complaints of stomachaches
• Headaches before school
• Increased clinginess
• Crying during drop-off
• Irritability
• Nail biting or nervous habits

These behaviors are common during the first few weeks of school but should gradually improve.

How Parents Can Prepare Before the First Day of School

One of the best back-to-school tips for parents is to begin preparing before school starts.

Help your child by:

• Visiting the school
• Driving the school route
• Practicing walking into the building
• Reading books about starting school
• Setting earlier bedtimes
• Practicing morning routines
• Letting your child pick out their backpack and school supplies

The more familiar school feels, the less intimidating it becomes. 

Do “Backpack Test Runs” at Home

For Kindergarteners, they might not While it may seem like a small detail, a backpack filled with school supplies can feel surprisingly heavy and unfamiliar to a young child. Taking time to practice at home can help build confidence and make that first day much smoother.  A few days before school starts, pack your child’s backpack with the items they’ll likely carry each day, such as: 

• A lunch box
• Water bottle
• Folder
• Pencil box
• Library book (if applicable)
• Light jacket or sweater

How to Make the Most of School Open House

One of the best opportunities to reduce first day of school anxiety is attending your school’s open house.

Instead of simply dropping off supplies, use this time to help your child become comfortable.

Encourage your child to:

• Sit at their desk
• Meet their teacher
• Find the bathroom
• Locate the cafeteria
• Practice their dismissal route
• Visit the playground
• Explore the classroom

Children often become much more confident after seeing where they will spend their day.

Questions to Ask Your Child’s Teacher During Open House

Many parents wonder what they should ask during open house. Here are some of the most important questions.

Classroom Expectations

• What does a typical school day look like?
• What routines should we practice at home?
• How is homework handled?
• How do students ask for help?

Communication

• How do you communicate with parents?
• Do you use an app?
• How quickly should parents expect responses?

Learning

• What academic skills are emphasized this year?
• How do you measure progress?
• What happens if my child begins falling behind?

Social Skills

• How do you encourage friendships?
• How are conflicts handled?
• How do you support shy children?

Emotional Well-Being

• How do you help children who become overwhelmed?
• What calming strategies are used in the classroom?
• How can parents reinforce those strategies at home?

Questions to Ask School Administration

School administrators can answer questions beyond the classroom.

Consider asking about:

School Safety

• Visitor procedures
• Building security
• Emergency plans
• Dismissal procedures

Student Support

• School counselors
• School psychologists
• Reading interventions
• Behavioral supports
• Special education services

Parent Communication

• School newsletters
• Parent portals
• Volunteer opportunities
• PTO/PTA information

Therapy Services

If your child receives outside therapy, ask:

• How do school staff communicate with outside therapists?
• How are accommodations shared with teachers?
• Who should parents contact if concerns arise during the year?

Helping Your Child Manage School Anxiety

Children look to parents for reassurance.

Try these simple strategies:

✔ Stay positive about school.

✔ Validate your child’s feelings.

Instead of saying:

“Don’t be scared.”

Try saying:

“It’s okay to feel nervous. New things can feel scary, and I’m proud of you for being brave.”

✔ Keep morning routines calm.

✔ Avoid long goodbyes.

✔ Celebrate small successes after school.

When School Anxiety May Need Additional Support

While first day of school jitters usually improve after a few weeks, some children continue to struggle.

You may want to seek professional support if your child:

• Frequently refuses school
• Has daily stomachaches without a medical cause
• Experiences panic attacks
• Has significant separation anxiety
• Withdraws from peers
• Has emotional outbursts after school
• Struggles with classroom participation

Early intervention can make a significant difference in helping children build confidence and coping skills. 

Helping Children Thrive This School Year

The first few weeks of school are filled with new experiences, new friendships, and new opportunities for growth. While some nervousness is expected, preparation and support can help children build confidence and enjoy a successful school year. If your child continues to experience challenges with school anxiety, communication, sensory processing, motor development, emotional regulation, or social skills, Therapy Smarts is here to help.

As an Inc. 5000 award-winning company and the recipient of Best of Durham and Best of Chapel Hill honors, Therapy Smarts proudly provides pediatric Occupational Therapy, Physical Therapy, Speech Therapy, Mental Health Therapy, ABA Therapy, and Psychological Evaluations with no waitlists for pediatric physical therapy, speech therapy, or mental health services in our Durham and Chapel Hill clinics.

Contact us today, (919) 378-1340 to learn how we can help your child start the school year with confidence.